Night of the Living Dead

Some jackass got so zombie drunk that we couldn't let him back in the bar. When his buddies couldn't get him into a cab Nick, one of our bigger door men helped wrestle the guy into one. An hour later we kicked some other dude out for something or other. That's when zombie drunk guy came back.

These two mental midgets decided they didn't like one another. Zombie took off his jacket and flexing his baby gap muscles. Genius 2 was making fun of Zombie's neck tattoo. I got between them and held our stringy zombie gangster at bay. A strong wind would have knocked him over on his best day, and today was not even close to his best day.

After while a cop happened to walk by and looked the kid. "Hey, get in a cab or go to jail."
"Ohh, you think you're so fucking tough, fucking cop!" the kid slurred.
"Nope, but you need to leave"
"Oh, what are you gonna do, you can't do shit" the kid informed the cop, arms out like Michael Flatley.
"Ok," the cop replied.
I was standing not far off (Like this big cop needed back up) and couldn't help but laugh as this kid kept trying to put the cop down, and the cop kept letting him talk, making the kid more and more angry. A second cop arrived so I took my leave.

Nick and I were standing by the door a few minutes later when Zombie kid decided to take things a little too far. He head faked one of the cops and cocked his fist back. He got straight armed to the face by one cop as another tackled him. He was face down on the sidewalk with both hands behind his back  in a heartbeat, shivering like an idiot in his tiny little wife beater.

Had he just gotten in the cab he would have woken up with a hang over. But now he's going to wake up in a cell. He'll be charged for possession of whatever drugs the cops found on him, and for assaulting and officer, and public intoxication.

But hey, he sure told that cop didn't he!?