Side Boob Hour

Friday night Detroit returned. She got dropped off and sauntered up to the bar with a huge smile on her face. We just looked at her, amazed she had the gall to return. James clenched his jaw and shook his head at her. 

“Oh come on, I’ll behave I promise” she laughed.

“Nope,” James replied “three strikes, you’re out”

She looked a little hurt but was undeterred “oh, but I’ve learned my lesson” she cooed. She was wearing a short dress that was cut in a way that would have made here the star of Peter Griffin’s “Side-boob Hour”
James stood his ground.

“But I just got dropped off!” she said, obviously hurt.
“There’s cabs right over there” I offered. She ignored me and looked at James.
“Can we talk over here?” she asked pointing to a spot away from the door; and ear shot.
“Sure, but it won’t make any difference”

They walked away and had a quick conversation resulting in Detroit stomping away like a child who did NOT get her way. She hopped in a cab and never returned.

“How’d that go?” I asked jokingly.

“She said she’d make it worth my while.” James said flatly.

“So is coming back then?” I joked again.

“No” he said even more flatly, then kind of shook as though a chill went through him.

“She also told me she wasn’t wearing any underwear” he continued. Then a chill went through me.

Saturday started slow, but it picked up around 11. At one point I looked outside and saw James

dealing with a line. In the middle of the line was a dude wearing one of those furry hats with a face and ears on it that has two long arms stretching down with pockets/mittens at the end. His looked like some sort of fox, or maybe a bear. It looked like something you’d see a Japanese school girl at a comic book convention wearing. Whatever. He was a space cadet. He looked like he might have done ALL the drugs that night. But, he seemed relatively harmless so he was let in.

After about an hour I saw him being pulled off the dancefloor. He struggled and ended up on the wet floor with about 600lbs of bouncer holding him down. I wandered over to keep anyone from dummying one of our guys from behind. He gave up fighting and said he’d go peacefully if we found his animal hat thing. I grabbed it and brought it out to him. Then he asked for his girlfriend. Fine…I’ll get her now too.

I found her sitting all cozy with some dude. I said “Hey, are you with that dude with the furby hat?”
“Yeah” she said.
“Well, we tossed him out, his waiting outside for you”
“I don’t want to go outside” she said.
Fine by me. I went back out and told Furby his girl was staying.
“But that’s my girlfriend” he said all wide eyed and confused.
“Yeah well, I can’t MAKE her come out(I suppose I could have, but why bother) so you’ll have to call her later, but you need to leave now or I’m gonna have you arrested”
“Can I go in and talk to her?” he asked, the same way a child might ask if he could pet your Doberman.

“No, you need to leave, now”

Furby took off for a bit, then came back, then left and came back, each time explaining that he had a girlfriend and she was inside.

I found out later that Furby’s girl was talking to some guy on the dancefloor, Furby took exception and tried to shove the guy a few times.  That’s why he got tossed. The girlfriend and the other dude were still inside getting cozy.

Eventually she came out with the cozy dude. Furby was standing at the end of the building smoking. His girlfriend walked over, they chatted for a minute and then left together, leaving the cozy dude standing there looking foolish.

Three girls walked up, one of them worked for us before and the others were regulars. All three girls are very pretty, and very lesbian. As they chatted with us on their way in Cozy guy walked up and started chatting them up. “Hey, if you ladies are going in, can I get a dance?”
I laughed and shook his shoulder. “You ever hear the term ‘barking up the wrong tree’ bud? It’s not your night.”
He just looked at me confused. The girls blew him off and went inside. He followed them sadly and desperately.

And that was pretty much it for Saturday.